Navigating Mixed Emotions as a Direct Sales Consultant: A Lesson in Letting Go

[byrd1956]

Having a tough time 'blessing and releasing'. A former student (I have known her since she was in seventh grade and we have been FB friends for some time) that had a show for me last year (her past host discount expires at the end of November) just posted she has signed up to be a consultant. I welcomed her to the business and asked who she signed up under. She told me someone she met at an airport. I asked if the she had been asked if she had a consultant. She said yes. She told the consultant that she had a consultant 'in the past'. She then apologized and said she felt it was what she was being lead to do and wanted to be with the company. (I had mentioned to her before if she was ever interested to let me know; she was not at the time.)
I told her no problem after she apologized, but it did hurt that she said I was in the past. Her mom works in my school district and she has ordered from me a number of times. Her mom has a bridal shower for her and she actually booked her show from the one her mom had. Turns out the lady she signed under is suppose to be a biggie with the company and lives in another state.
I told her if she has any questions to ask as we try to always help each other. I asked if she wanted me to remover her from my newsletter and she said yes.
It felt like a punch; I would never think of someone being 'in the past' if it was less than a year. When someone tells me they have had a consultant I always ask the consultant name and if they still hear from them. All this said I am happy for her and she is very excited to start her new adventure. I am not really asking for advice I guess I just needed to tell others; this could happen to anyone.

 

[DebPC]

Always a bummer. Almost anyone in our biz has probably had something like this happen. The life skill of truly moving on is definitely an important one.

 

[scottcooks]

Too, she may simply see you as her former teacher - and that's where 'in the past' comes from. I know from experience how it burns when you think about past hosts and past customers starting their business; arguably I had a similar experience starting - though I urgently tried to start with the person who initially invited me, but after 2 HO emails to contact her with no response, I went back to HO for a 3rd time and found my recruiter. The hard lesson is, keep in touch with those interested. I don't do a great job of it, either; but it's good to keep in touch. Take care!

 

[baychef]

Oh boy, I hate these moments! I have been on both sides of the fence. Have one lady that wants to resign (but doubt if she will) and she was under one of my consultants. But also have had people sign under others that have done parties with me before. No one wins it seems.

 

[Tami in CT]

I don't think you should feel hurt at all. It's very likely that your former student sees you as a friend of her mother's (aka: an older person) and she would feel more comfortable with someone closer to her own age or someone she considers a peer. I signed up about 20 years ago with the consultant at a show I was attending and then later found that we did not have anything in common and who didn't really offer me any support or help. My business fizzled quickly as I was great at selling (because I love the products), but terrible at getting new bookings. Now I am looking to sign up again, but I am being choosy about who I sign with. Rather than the first person I meet who is in the PC business, I want someone who is at at least the Advanced Director level and who will invest some time and energy into helping me grow my business, someone who is ranked high in sales, someone who holds consultant training, someone friendly, someone nearby, etc.I'm sure that the younger woman never intended to snub or hurt you in any way and the best thing you could do is congratulate her and offer her a willing ear if she comes to you with any questions down the road.

 

[byrd1956]

Tami, that is what I have been doing. I understand where you are coming from. I have met many customers that were not happy with their consultant because they bothered them too much. I guess we have to find the happy medium for everyone.

 

[chefashleigh]

I was a consultant years ago and I signed up under my friend that had hosted a party and then a bridal shower for me. She has since left the company as I have. I am looking to get back in and I went to the upline that had kept in contact with me occasionally over the years. I also was a 31 consultant and someone I considered my best friend joined under my upline instead of me. That really stung and I pulled away from the business and never quite recovered from that.

 

[byrd1956]

chefashleigh, that would definitely hurt as she was a best friend. I hope your hurt will ease as time goes on. As for my former student she is going gang-busters and I am proud of what she is accomplishing.