Kitchen Diva
Gold Member
- 4,953
More poems by KaceyBack by popular demand.... Oh, wait- they weren't popular or demaned. Alright- then appearing for the first time on CS- high faluting poetry by yours truly! Please keep in mind I wrote these about 10+ years ago.
Untitled
I think my brain fell out today
and rolled onto the floor,
Got up and wandered down the hall
and right out my front door
This made the easiest things real hard,
like tying up my shoe,
or how to put my trousers on-
I haven't got a clue!
It's much too small to be out alone
just walking down the street,
for now my head is empty
and I've forgotten how to eat.
I can't remember how to comb my hair,
or how to pick my nose
My legs aren't working either
and I cannot find my toes.
I don't remember who I am
or what my address is-
I forgot to put the cap on tight,
now my cola has no fizz.
I forgot just how to count to 10
and misplaced my ABC's
I'm pretty sure I need a snack
so I think I'll eat some bee's
I think I'll take a bath now
before I go insane
I'll use this nice new grayish sponge
Hey wait- I just found my brain!
ART
I have 6 toes on my left foot and 7 on my right
Two thumbs up by my elbow, and one eye is sewed up tight.
My nose is somewhere by an ear that's over on the left, I have a mouth that's
crooked and a chin that's sort of cleft.
Me legs, are-well they're backwards and I'm told I'm out of sight,
but the greatest thing about me is that I'm a work of ART.
I have hands that are attached to my upper lower thigh, I have a belly button on my kneecap which is by my other eye. I have 1 finger in a nose hole and I have a couple hearts, but the greatest thing about me is that I'm a work of ART.
FUZZY
My grandpa he has fuzzy ears
and a hariy nose,
his fingers are quite furry
and there's hair upon his toes.
His arms are really hairy,
but his elbows are quite bare
And I'm pretty sure his kneecaps
aslo don't have any hair
There's whiskers on his chin and cheeks
which have adorned his face for weeks
His eyebrows are quite bushy,
which makes it hard for him to see.
A grizzly and a polar bear my grandpa
has been called-
but the funny thing about him
is his head's completely bald!
I have a really funny one I wrote while on the South Beach Diet- but I need to find that one- all the fellow Beacher's on the SBD board I was on LOVED it...
And now for my encore...
An Ode to Dill
Dill- sweet weedy dill, you are quite a silly herb-
You are used as so many things, but never as a verb.
You have soft leaves like a pretty fern
but you make my stomach burn
You ruin things like Salmon and a bread bowl filled with dip.
Just your smell alone puts a quiver in my lip.
Your snobbish and quite stubborn
little hors d'oeuvres you adorn
I think my garden is in a good state
because I will never find you upon my dinner plate!
Thank you-
I'm here all weekend!
Untitled
I think my brain fell out today
and rolled onto the floor,
Got up and wandered down the hall
and right out my front door
This made the easiest things real hard,
like tying up my shoe,
or how to put my trousers on-
I haven't got a clue!
It's much too small to be out alone
just walking down the street,
for now my head is empty
and I've forgotten how to eat.
I can't remember how to comb my hair,
or how to pick my nose
My legs aren't working either
and I cannot find my toes.
I don't remember who I am
or what my address is-
I forgot to put the cap on tight,
now my cola has no fizz.
I forgot just how to count to 10
and misplaced my ABC's
I'm pretty sure I need a snack
so I think I'll eat some bee's
I think I'll take a bath now
before I go insane
I'll use this nice new grayish sponge
Hey wait- I just found my brain!
ART
I have 6 toes on my left foot and 7 on my right
Two thumbs up by my elbow, and one eye is sewed up tight.
My nose is somewhere by an ear that's over on the left, I have a mouth that's
crooked and a chin that's sort of cleft.
Me legs, are-well they're backwards and I'm told I'm out of sight,
but the greatest thing about me is that I'm a work of ART.
I have hands that are attached to my upper lower thigh, I have a belly button on my kneecap which is by my other eye. I have 1 finger in a nose hole and I have a couple hearts, but the greatest thing about me is that I'm a work of ART.
FUZZY
My grandpa he has fuzzy ears
and a hariy nose,
his fingers are quite furry
and there's hair upon his toes.
His arms are really hairy,
but his elbows are quite bare
And I'm pretty sure his kneecaps
aslo don't have any hair
There's whiskers on his chin and cheeks
which have adorned his face for weeks
His eyebrows are quite bushy,
which makes it hard for him to see.
A grizzly and a polar bear my grandpa
has been called-
but the funny thing about him
is his head's completely bald!
I have a really funny one I wrote while on the South Beach Diet- but I need to find that one- all the fellow Beacher's on the SBD board I was on LOVED it...
And now for my encore...
An Ode to Dill
Dill- sweet weedy dill, you are quite a silly herb-
You are used as so many things, but never as a verb.
You have soft leaves like a pretty fern
but you make my stomach burn
You ruin things like Salmon and a bread bowl filled with dip.
Just your smell alone puts a quiver in my lip.
Your snobbish and quite stubborn
little hors d'oeuvres you adorn
I think my garden is in a good state
because I will never find you upon my dinner plate!
Thank you-
I'm here all weekend!
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